I’ll be honest. Writing in this blog has become a daunting task for me. I’m not really sure why. Maybe because I am generally worn out. Maybe because I have a list of excuses. Maybe because none of them are good enough. Caitlin wrote recently (and she said this too, “I don’t feel like citing”) that she had this fantastic plan for productivity while her husband was out of town, but she ended up watching TV. Well, that’s me.
Except I’ve been watching TV in Arlington, VA, in my new apartment, when I’m not working at my new job at EMSolutions. I love them, by the way. And Virginia, despite trying to piss me off sometimes, is generally amazing too.
I haven’t been running. I haven’t been training, really, at all. I have gained roughly 8-10 pounds. That wouldn’t be such a big deal to me, except I didn’t gain it slowly. In fact, I thought I was invincible for the first 6-8 weeks that I was off my weight management program. Also, I feel like shit. My performance in Top Gun was the polar opposite from that of Escape and St. A’s (I’ll link those later. I’m too lazy to open Escape and I haven’t even written St. A’s. Oh my god, just wait for St. A’s!) Finally, I’m at the peak fit of my clothes and I refuse to go up a size. As Jen, A Prior Fat Girl wrote about her recent gain and pursuit to lose it, it may just be 9 pounds, but that’s the kind of thinking that made me overweight. It’s a flag, a warning.
Time to buckle down. Blog, training, nutrition, and all my other to-dos.
Not that this post really had a point. It’s not any of the 30 posts on my daunting to-do list. But if I’ve ever learned anything, it’s that the only way to finish something is to start it.
I suppose the point is: I’m alive. I’m not perfect. I live in DC, now. My job’s pretty grand. We’ll get to the “I miss Florida, but Virginia has its perks” posts later.
This totally had point Kat! I know I’ve had weeks (dare I say months) of the exact same feeling. I know I should be doing this or I should be doing that but I’m just too emotionally overloaded. It will take some time, but you’ll get back into it; acceptance is the first step (haha). Thanks for writing!
I know exactly what you mean. I used to love to blog, and now just the thought of it gives me anxiety. I think it might be because it was the reason I was let go from my magazine job (although it was totally just used as an excuse so they wouldn’t have to lay me off and give me severance). Ever since then, I haven’t been able to post. Which makes me sad. But I hope you keep yours going! And as for the weight gain, since Rich and I moved in together in April, I’ve gained about 15 pounds. Now that I have the time and means to join a gym, I’m going to do so and rejoin Weight Watchers. It’s all about balance!